Out of touch 'comedian' Roy 'Chubby' Brown (real name Royston Vasey) has replaced sarcasm as the lowest form of wit, it has been revealed.
Sarcasm has held the position of lowest form of wit for as long as anyone can remember, but is being superseded by Brown in light of the incontrovertible fact that sarcasm is hilarious.
Matthew Bradford, head of the Department of Ranking of Humour, explains why Brown was the obvious candidate for the job.
“Our decision to replace sarcasm with Roy 'Chubby' Brown arose after the discovery that being a racist, sexist, homophobic Neanderthal doesn't actually make you funny. It just serves as evidence as to why you should go and shoot yourself in the face.”
Bradford went on to express his personal distaste for Brown.
“He is a fundamentally unfunny man. The only time he ever made me laugh was when he got cancer. I thought it was a promising new spin on his career, and that he could have successfully capitalised on it by fucking off and dying painfully. Which the bastard didn't do.”
Brown often enlists the help of fellow bigoted fuckwits The Royal Family to assist him in scripting jokes
Now that it is no longer recognised as the lowest form of wit, Bradford believes that sarcasm will go from strength to strength.
“I only hope that sarcasm can go on to be recognised as an integral and credible from of humour, along with 'your mum' jokes, loud flatulence, and anything uttered by Stephen Fry, ever.”
Brown has yet to comment on his new position, most likely due to the fact that it generally takes him 3-5 working days to construct an intelligible and coherent sentence.
